More Stories of Recovery
Teach a Man to Fish
By: Liz K.
Hello, I am fifty-five and I finally have a college degree. I went to Cape Cod Community College for seven-plus years and earned an Associate’s Degree in 2002. In May 2008, I graduated from Bridgewater State College with a Bachelor of Science Degree.
Fairwinds Clubhouse has always been there, along every step of the way. Years ago, perhaps in 1997, I had to do a paper for my English Comp 1 class. I was trying to use/learn the word processing capability of the computer to do this. It was the first time I had sat down at a computer. I could not figure out any of it. A woman, a staff member of Fairwinds Clubhouse, decided to help me in my endeavors. I had tried to master a typewriter keyboard since high school. I was fascinated by the delete/backspace function of Microsoft Word and the copy/paste functionality of the standard toolbar, and could not do any of it.
In 1999, the Assistant Director of Fairwinds Clubhouse decided that it was time for me to be on the Internet. He sat me down at a computer and signed me up to a yahoo email address. I still use this address. As usual, I still had not gotten very far with my computer skills. I could not operate the mouse. It seemed to fly all over the place. Then the Director of the Clubhouse told me what to do. He told me to sit myself down at the computer and play a game of Solitaire until I had mastered the mouse. I played one game, and mastered the mouse.
In 2000, my older brother decided to give me his old computer, as he was upgrading. It took only about four months before I had to send the computer to the repair shop. I was able to use a computer at Fairwinds Clubhouse in the interim.
And one day in the Spring of 2002, I had to do a PowerPoint presentation for my last class at Cape Cod Community College, Introduction to Environmental Science. I was clueless. A staff member at Fairwinds decided to show me the basics of PowerPoint, and three slides later, I had the PowerPoint presentation. I received an A in this course.
More recently, I have been using the Fairwinds Clubhouse Typing Skills Teaching Program, as my keyboarding skills are still weak. I am now taking a GIS certification course, once again at Cape Cod Community College. I will use the Environmental Science course in this certification process. GIS stands for Geographic Information Systems of Science. It uses a complex computer software program. It is the wave of the future.
In 2008, laptops are required of all incoming freshmen at Bridgewater State College. We live in the age of the computer. Through their role as teachers, the staff at Fairwinds Clubhouse made both of my college degrees fact. I am so glad to be a member of Fairwinds Clubhouse.
Fairwinds Clubhouse Mission
The mission of Fairwinds Clubhouse is to provide opportunities for friendship, support, employment, and education to people with psychiatric disabilities who live on upper Cape Cod.
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Recovering from Mental Illness Takes Strength and Spirit
By: Marc L.
My journey with mental illness began in late 2001, a couple of months after 9/11. I was going through a very difficult time, as was my family, and those we turned to for help were unavailable to us. This, combined with a biological predisposition, led to my developing a mental illness.
The path to recovery for a person suffering from mental illness can be a long and arduous journey, with many obstacles along the way. I had my share of struggles. I experienced four arrests, twelve hospitalizations, spent one year in a locked facility, and was court-ordered to remain at a group home for two years. I spent six months on a farm in Western Massachusetts designated for people with mental illness, and was on home confinement for six months, not to mention all the manic and psychotic episodes that I went through during that time. I was also struggling to make sense of the loss of my sister, who had recently succumbed to anorexia nervosa. My sister was an accomplished runner, ranked ninth in the nation by Rhode Runner magazine. She graduated Cum Laude from Brown University in 2000, with a degree in psychology. She was intelligent and beautiful (she will always be so). She had her hangups that she could not come to terms with, but she did not deserve to die. I believe that all of our lives are journeys that bring us closer to our God, and although my sister’s death still makes little sense to me, I find comfort in the knowledge that she is now at peace.
I have come to terms with my illness and am at a good place in my recovery. After being discharged from the group home, I worked for a while, and am now a full-time student at Rhode Island College, where I should get my diploma shortly (I need three courses after this semester). I have maintained a 3.25 cumulative grade point average and I hope to go to graduate school to study to be a psychologist. Mental health means a lot to me. I think that because I can relate to those with mental illness, and because I care, I would be a good psychologist. Mental illness has been my cross to bear and my faith has been a great healer. Whatever the situations turn out to be, we must always remember to bear our crosses well, with strength and an unwavering spirit, and we must do so until we reap the rewards of our labor.
Editor’s Note: Marc L. is a client with Fellowship Health Resources’ Ocean State Outreach Program (OSO). OSO is a Mobile Treatment Team Program, based on the PACT model, offering support for individuals with serious and persistent mental illness in Rhode Island.
I Found Hope at FHR
By: Ellen P.
I came to Fellowship Health Resources one year ago to deal with depression, anxiety, bereavement and trauma after a loss. My family had tried to help, but couldn’t. No one understood me. I felt different from everyone else.
As a child growing up, I was not focused on accomplishments. I wanted to do things that were fun or pleasurable to distract me from my feelings of depression, anxiety and vulnerability.
I have always, to a certain degree, felt aimless in life. Sometimes I feel like a lost child, not knowing what to do and not knowing the ways of the world.
Then, I lost someone who was very dear to me. With her I felt understood and cared for. She was always there for me and accepted me for who I was. I knew happiness when I was with her.
I feel so much better than I did last year. FHR helped me understand and begin recovering from my anxiety and depression through weekly therapy sessions. I have grown as a person and am better able to face new challenges, adversity and I trust myself more. At FHR I feel understood and cared for. I feel like I am getting my life back. I was at the bottom of the barrel, thinking and feeling bad things. I’m finally getting my psychological frame of mind in order. But I need to continue to work on my recovery to regain my mental health.
FHR legitimized my feelings. Everyone at FHR has helped me in my recovery. I have learned so much and come so far. I believe things will continue to get better.
FHR has made a difference in my life.
Editor’s Note: Ellen P. has requested that her name and image not be used. Respectfully, the name of the woman in the story above has been changed.
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At Fellowship Health Resources Pennsylvania (FHR PA), Individuals Living with Mental Illness Find a Resource for Recovery – Brian’s Story
Since opening its doors to the community in January 2004, Fellowship Health Resources Pennsylvania (FHR PA) has provided nearly 4,000 individuals with the resources necessary to live full and satisfying lives, while recovering from mental illness and addiction. One such individual is Brian and this is his story.
In January 2002, the day after my birthday, I tried to commit suicide. This was my third suicide attempt, and I was put in the hospital. Because of my depression and my history of suicide attempts, I was put on an Involuntary Outpatient Commitment to treatment. I began attending a facility where I tried several different medications. Unable to find the right medication for me, I kept taking myself off my medications and began abusing alcohol and drugs. This continued to lead to involuntary hospitalizations, twenty-two in all.
I continued having troubles with the mental health agency I was attending and I was eventually thrown out. That is when I was referred to FHR PA. I was very nervous during my intake because of all of the negative experiences I had in the past. I was assigned a Psychiatrist, a Therapist, an Intensive Case Manager (ICM), and later agreed to attend the Psychiatric Rehabilitation Program (Psych Rehab). During my sessions and at Psych Rehab, I was treated with the utmost respect. This was very new to me. I began attending Psych Rehab three days per week. At first I was scared, but I made a lot of friends and everyone made me feel like I was worth something. Everybody was very professional, courteous, and very helpful. The main objective of my treatment was to help me with my mental illness, and make me feel good about myself. Before I came to FHR PA, I had no confidence in myself and I always wished I would die.
My official start date at Fellowship Health Resources Pennsylvania was February 9, 2005, and my start date at Psych Rehab was March 9, 2005. These dates are very important to me because this was the start of my transformation.
I always feel good about myself coming to FHR PA. During every session, I was pushed to set goals and follow through with them. Because of this, I have been able to stay out of the hospital for the past two and a half years! With the help of my treatment team, along with the housing coordinator, I was able to move out of my father’s house and into my own apartment for the first time in my life; I’m 44 years old. I moved into a one-bedroom apartment across the street from FHR PA so I was close, in case I had any problems. Since I moved into my own apartment, I have become happy and very confident in myself for the first time in over ten years. I also started working part-time in a restaurant and help my friend out with DJ services.
I am very grateful for FHR PA, and I think that going there saved my life!
I am also happy to report that as of July 18, 2007, after five years, I was discharged from my Involuntary Outpatient order to treatment! I finally have an understanding of my illness and am learning how to properly manage my illness! I plan to continue attending services at FHR PA because I have no room for failure in my life, and I want to keep moving forward. I have never been happier than I am now, and I plan to continue moving up!
Brian’s Story Update
September 2008
Since I last had my story published, I have been off my court-ordered I.O.C. for over a year. I also renewed my lease at my apartment. My relationship with my father is great, and also with my brother. He got married in January 2008, and I was the best man and DJ in his wedding. I am still very happy and have a lot of self-confidence. I am working part-time still and I am still going to Fellowship and keeping my appointments. I have found a new medication that seems to work very well for me. I’m also in the process of cleaning out my old house where I have a lot of bad memories of losing my mother. My mother is still my inspiration to do well every day. I had a hard time letting go with the house in the beginning, but have come to realize having the house sold will be one of the best things for my mental health.
Editor’s Note: Brian is a client with Fellowship Pennsylvania (FHR PA) a Program of Fellowship Health Resources, Inc. FHR PA provides behavioral health services to the community, which includes the recovery model of a Single Clinical Home (SCH). Conveniently located on Wheatland Street in Phoenixville, PA, the program offers clients a broad range of comprehensive services, both on-site and in the clients’ home environment that were formerly not available within a single program. Key components of the model include: Outpatient Services, Targeted Case Management, a Psychiatric Rehabilitation Day Program, and a CTT (Community Treatment Team).
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FHR PRISMMODEL Enourages David S. Out of His Shell
When Fellowship Health Resources opened Ralph Street in Bangor, Maine, in 1999, David S. was one of the program’s first residents. At the time, mental illness seriously compromised David’s day-to-day life. He was not able to participate in household activities and spent much of his time sleeping. David’s speech patterns were difficult to discern and he maintained little family or community contact. When David did venture out he would often just sit in the vehicle while his housemates joined in activities. The hospital that discharged David did not expect him to remain successfully in the Ralph Street program; however, to date David has not had any hospitalizations.
Today David is quite a different person. He attends Day Program regularly and participates in all of the focus activities. He loves to cook and has recently taken on the chore of making Ralph Street’s snacks twice per week. David goes out weekly with the Case Manager to shop for the meal that he prepares for the rest of his housemates. During that time, David will purchase his own favorites of candy and pizza along with the week’s supply of milk for the house. David’s family is now an important part of his life, visiting him weekly when they are in the area during the summer months.
David’s other favorite pastime is motorcycles. He has started going on outings to the local Harley Davidson store to look at the bikes, and visitors to David’s room will find it loaded with Harley Davidson ‘gear’ and collectibles. From pillowcases to socks, if it boasts the Harley logo, David has probably given it a special spot in his room.
On the first Friday of the month Ralph Street residents go out to eat. Initially, for David, this involved simply going through the drive thru. It was difficult for David to sit in a restaurant, wait to order, wait for the food, and then eat in public. After over two years of staff support and encouragement, David now actually gets excited about going out and talks about it all month long. During last month’s “dine out,” David was walking around the restaurant enjoying the décor and pinball machines.
David is generally a shy person. He is not comfortable with crowds, new places, or having his picture taken. Amazingly, David attended Maine’s launch of the Fellowship’s PRISMMODEL in March of 2006 at a local conference center, and allowed staff to take his picture. The image of David is one full of smiles and excitement. This enthusiasm is what staff members strive for each day from David, and guided by the Fellowship’s PRISMMODEL philosophy, they are rewarded.
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